“Hey Candy. Crush me!”
“Gummy Bear Senryu” by the Distracted Pastor, 2019
I laugh. The gummy bear flew.
Twenty six pounds hurts.
I wrote this senryu to play a little bit with the “Games Night” theme at the dVerse Poets’ Pub. I have played enough video games to realize that it is sometimes fun to pretend not to know anything about them.
This poem is inspired by a twenty six pound Gummy Bear that you can actually buy. Who needs chocolates for Valentine’s Day? Seriously though, you could kill someone with that thing. I imagine it’ll make an appearance in a Dead Rising game at some point if it hasn’t already.
By the way, this is my 200th blog post! I have others scheduled for the next few days, but I wanted to say thank you to everyone who keeps encouraging me by reading and enjoying my posts, even when they’re silly. Blessings to you.
Distracted Pastor Ramblings 
Congratulations on your 200th post! I’m honoured that you used a dVerse prompt for it. This is great fun – I can’t imagine a 26lb gummy bear. Where would you start?
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Blunt force trauma. Yeah, I have no idea where to start, but I am really tempted to buy one and have it dropped off at my wife’s work on April Fools’ Day.
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So, I had to look it up. There’s an official video.
https://www.vat19.com/item/26-pound-party-gummy-bear
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32,000 calories. Also that video was… unique and rather amusing.
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I think you would die from eating such a creation…
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On Youtube there are videos of all kinds of giant food; very unique and difficult task. Then again, Costco sells ten pound jars of peanut butter, and mayonnaise in 20 pound tubs.
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What a wonderful idea for a terrible Christmas gift. Can you imagine being the person who received a 20 pound tub of mayonnaise at an office Christmas gift exchange?
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Congratulations on 200! This made me smile Robert! 🙂
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Thank you! I went to bed smiling about it.
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Congratulations on 200. I enjoyed this, even if I can’t quite imagine a 26lb gummy bear…nor want to see one. 🙂
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i love it!
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I loved the humor in your poem! She probably rolled her eyes too!
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That is a heavy gummy bear.
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What apt words — candy crush!! Love it!
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Well….I continue to learn at dVerse. Had to look up SENRYU. Enjoyed yours! A 26 pound gummy bear just sounds grotesque! Maybe it could be used as one of those frustration balls that you just keep squeezing in your hand? Except it would probably make your hand all sticky! And it would probably take kneading with two hands!
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Ok, that works. A silly senryu! I’d take care of him if he was lime. I like lime.
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